Cardio, Double Tap, and Other Stuff Scary Movies Taught Us About Avoiding COVID-19

Cool Spooktacular Bristol Rhythm playlist included!

I think we can all agree 2020 has been one giant dumpster fire. As we enter the Halloween season, you might be thinking reality has become a little like living a scary movie. This got me to thinking: if this were a scary movie, how could we flip the script? Hasn’t the horror genre taught us everything we need to know about surviving until the credits? And because every good Halloween flick needs a killer soundtrack, I’ve included a Spooktacular Bristol Rhythm playlist on Spotify to aid in your assault on COVID-19, with nearly five hours of music by your favorite festival artists! From the trailer through the double feature, we got you covered.

Various memes about 2020. 1) A dumpster on fire with 2020 captioned. 2) Rod Serling from the Twilight Zone captioned "Historians Introducting A Documentary about 2020 - What you're about the watch is a nightmare." 3) A sign that says "I wanted zombies this virus sucks. 4) Someone holding a protest sign that reads "This episode of black mirror sucks."
Top 4 memes of 2020.

Please understand, I mean no disrespect. My intent is not to make light of the pandemic, its victims, or the tragedies we are facing as a society. COVID-19 has attacked my industry and many others, our friends and family, cancelled our favorite festival and now my favorite holiday – Halloween. But if the horror genre has taught me anything, it’s that light almost always conquers darkness, and that keeping a sense of humor through hard times is crucial to survival. But. Like Laurie Strode beat down the Boogeyman, I’m ready to kick some COVID ass!

Ultimate scream queen Jamie Lee Curtis as Laurie Strode in John Carpenter's 1978 masterpiece Halloween. A pandemic mask with tiny Halloween pumpkins has been photoshopped to her face.
“I got your mask right here, Michael.”
Ultimate scream queen Jamie Lee Curtis as Laurie Strode in John Carpenter’s 1978 masterpiece Halloween. Credit Compass International Pictures, Falcon International Pictures, and Falcon International Productions.

An examination of the zombie sub-genre of horror by masters Romero, Kirkman, Boyle, Brooks, and Fleisher is essential right now because their work imparts an over-arching social commentary, including the dissection of human behavior, during times of fictional global crisis. Therein you may find one section of the population, like besties Shaun and Ed of Shaun of the Dead, who just want to wait it out over pints at The Winchester until help shows up.

Cast members of the film Shaun of the Dead sitting in a booth at The Winchester pub raising up pints of beer and smiling.
Liz (Kate Ashfield), Shaun (Simon Pegg), Shaun’s Mum Barbara (Penelope Wilton), and Ed (Nick Frost) “waiting it out” over pints of beer at The Winchester, a neighborhood pub.
Good times.
From the 2004 feature film Shaun of the Dead, credit Rogue Pictures, StudioCanal, Working Title Films

In contrast you may find characters on a mission, like Tallahassee in Zombieland who would face down a horde of the undead for a single Twinkie. Eventually Tallahassee meets up with Columbus and learned there are rules. If those rules were applied to the here and now, they kind of make sense. Let’s break it down:

Columbus (Jesse Eisenburgh) and Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) and the search for Twinkies in Zombieland 2009.
Credit Columbia Pictures, Relativity Media, Pariah.

Rule #1 – Cardio (References the ability to outrun danger.)
Conditioning during the pandemic isn’t the worst idea. Stay strong, friends!

Rule #2 – Double Tap (Always make sure a zombie is decommissioned, i.e. a second shot to the head)
When a sink is nowhere to be found, have sanitizer ready as a back up. Go for the big guns and hit that pump twice so you’re covered.

Rule #3 – Beware of Bathrooms (Don’t get trapped with your pants down.)
Public restrooms can be sketch, so make going potty in a strange place a fun game! It’s called “Not Touching Stuff with Your Bare Hands” and anyone can play! Be resourceful, get creative! Give yourself points for ingenuity!
Judge if you will, but I was playing this game for years before COVID-19 because poo.

A tidy midcentury modern looking bathroom with someone about to open the shower curtain from inside the bathtub.
The bathroom in room 237 at The Overlook Hotel appears clean, but it’s very, very dirty.
1980 The Shining, credit Warner Bros., Hawk Films, Peregrine, Producers Circle

Rule #4 Seatbelts (For obvious reasons.)
Okay, this one really won’t protect you from COVID-19, but I mention it because it’s a safety precaution, just like wearing a mask, and seatbelts don’t seem to trigger anybody into a political argument. You just wear ’em and shut up about it.

Rule #7 Travel Light (You never know when you need to bolt.)
Wallet? Check. Keys? Check. Mask and hand sanitizer? Check, check.

Four people in a car wearing seatbelts with COVI-19 masks photoshopped to their faces.
Mark (Will Poulter), Christian (Jack Reynor), and Dani (Florence Pugh) believe in safety first, but their first mistake was trusting Pelle (Vilhelm Blomgren).
From Midsommar 2019 credit A24, B-Reel Films, Nordisk Film, Square Peg.

Rule #17 Be a Hero (Amended rule from the previous, don’t be a hero–sometimes you have to be a helper.)
Imagine how many times you’ve distanced, masked up and not infected anyone with COVID-19! You’re already a hero!

Sigourney Weaver in the movie alien stalking her prey with a big gun and wearing a photoshopped COVID mask.
Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) knows what it takes to be the final girl.
From Ridley Scott’s legendary sci-fi horror film Alien, 1979. Credit Brandywine Productions.

Rule #22 When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out
Don’t be afraid to say “no” to situations that don’t make you feel safe. These are extraordinary times, and the sooner we lick this thing, the sooner we can all get back to normal.

Rule #31 Check the Back Seat
Can’t find your mask? Did you check the back seat?

Actor Alex Wolff in the driver's seat of his car looking pensively into the rear view mirror.
You don’t want to know what was really in his back seat.
Alex Wolff as Peter in 2018’s Hereditary, one of the greatest and most
disturbing horror movies of the last decade.
Credit PalmStar Media, Finch Entertainment, Windy Hill Pictures.

Rule #32 Enjoy the Little Things
Don’t take anything for granted. Let’s show each other some kindness and compassion, and be grateful for all the little things that make us happy. Like family, friends, and good music!

Several cast members of the show The Walking Dead standing in a field at sunset holding weapons as if they are ready for battle.
Even through a zombie apocalypse, Rick Grimes and the gang understand that the key to living their lives with unmasked freedom is by having a good moral compass, protecting the group, and taking down walkers (a.k.a. zombies) with a swift headshot.
The cast of The Walking Dead credit American Movie Classics (AMC), Circle of Confusion, Valhalla Motion Pictures, Darkwoods Productions, AMC Studios, Idiot Box Productions

One positive thing about scary times and scary stories is what they teach us about ourselves. Even the most unassuming characters can turn out to be the toughest and most resourceful, and there is safety in numbers when we all choose to stick together and do the right thing. I pray we all actively choose to be heroes and protect each other, because our lives just may depend on it. I desperately want us all to dance together next year during Bristol Rhythm & Roots Reunion on State Street without masks and without the threat of COVID-19. Even scary stories sometimes have happy endings, and after all we’ve been through in 2020, I think we deserve one.

We hope you enjoy this musical Halloween treat from us: A Spooktacular Bristol Rhythm Spotify Playlist! From Appalachian murder ballads to rip-roarin’ rockabilly monster rock, some roots songs conjure an atmosphere worthy of any big screen thriller. I dug down deep into the vault of past Bristol Rhythm artists to come up with some killer tracks for this season of the witch – and found dozens of chilling tunes that rattle bones and tell some scary little stories of their own.

Marketing Specialist at the Birthplace of Country Music

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